Middle school can be a tough time for pre-teens and young teenagers struggling to find their place among their peers. Middle school sports can be a great way for them to connect with others and develop other life skills. (To see a full list of life skills teenagers need see this list Ten Important Teen Life Skills They Need To Master To Thrive In Adulthood.
Middle school is a tough transition for our kids.
They leave the comfort and certainty of the small elementary setting, where they knew every student and teacher and felt safe and secure.
Then, they enter through the doors of a much bigger place to wander new halls full of crowds of kids and adults they don’t recognize.
They face challenging academic curriculums, a long list of school rules and classroom policies to learn and follow, and a student culture that can be overwhelming, scary, unpredictable, and hard.
Middle school isn’t easy for anyone.
These are the years when our kids feel so much pressure to fit in with their peers.
They are trying to learn about all the different social circles that middle school kids create, and they desperately want to figure out where they belong in this new and overwhelming landscape. Our kids are slowly discovering who they are and how they can manage the stress of peer pressure that can be cruel and cunning, competitive, and confusing.
Middle school can be a rough time for pre-teens and teens. Thankfully, most schools also offer many opportunities for students to find their place so they feel like they belong. Encouraging your child to participate in an activity sponsored by their middle school can make a huge difference in their experience.
The positive role sports can play in middle school.
While anything that gets your student involved at their school is great, there are many reasons sports can help guide them through the awkward middle school phase.
Besides the obvious fact that staying active is good for any child (and helps manage mental health issues such as anxiety and depression), sports offer an opportunity to meet new people and connect with others. While some kids may have already played a sport for years, middle school is often the time when many kids pick up something new, either through intramurals or a competitive school-sponsored team.
There are also no-cut sports like track and field or cross country, which can be a lot of fun.
Most middle schools offer a variety of different sports their students can choose to participate in throughout the year. Middle school athletic programs often provide opportunities that may include football, volleyball, golf, track and field, cross country, tennis, wrestling, basketball, softball, baseball, soccer, or lacrosse.
My son benefitted tremendously from his middle school sports experience, and I enjoyed it too. He tried two new sports he never played previously, so don’t dismiss this idea just because your kid doesn’t have the experience they can’t play. For most schools, a kid doesn’t have to be an all-star athlete to participate Chances are the team will often be comprised of a mix of kids who know about the sport and many who are trying it for the first time.
While it’s great that your student may develop a new skill or love for the game, the real benefits of middle school sports come from meeting new people, developing resilience, and putting yourself out there.
Here are six reasons why middle school sports are good for your kids
1. Your kids have the opportunity to learn how to play a sport without prior experience.
This is when your kid can pick and choose a sport of interest and participate in the program without ever having played it. Most middle school coaches are encouraging and patient in helping each athlete learn and develop the required skills for each sport. There is a nice variety of skill levels for the kids involved, so your child won’t feel out of place if they are beginners. It’s a perfect opportunity to have them try something new without the pressure to be the best or worry about getting cut from the team, like most competitive club sports.
2. Your kids will meet new friends and learn to work with them as a team.
Every sport builds a community of teammates who develop fast friendships and support one another throughout the season. It’s a fantastic way for your kids to meet new students and feel a sense of belonging to a group at their school. Through all their time spent training and competing as a team, your kid will feel empowered by the comradery and unifying spirit.
Often, true and lasting friendships emerge from all the social aspects of participating in a sports program. My son met many new friends and matured in various social skills. He learned how to cooperate with others and communicate more effectively with both his coach and his teammates.
3. Your kids will experience the pressure and excitement of constructive competition.
No matter the sport, the competitive events will develop your child’s ability to withstand and embrace the pressure in the heat of the match, the meet, the game, or the race.
Constructive competition in middle school sports will teach your kids how to manage their mental and physical well-being during high-intensity moments that can be stressful yet exhilarating. Experiencing the thrill of competition is exciting for all athletes, and it builds tough skin for those hard-fought wins and disappointing losses.
4. Your kids will learn new ways to manage adversity and grow their self-esteem
One of the most important life skills big kids need to learn is resiliency. As new athletic skills are learned and practiced, your middle schooler will surely experience setbacks and challenges that are difficult to endure. Training in any sport will be hard, so your kids will feel an incredible sense of fulfillment when they improve.
Many teens and tweens today are struggling with low self-esteem issues for various reasons. Working consistently toward a goal can also build their self-worth. They will use new muscles, try new skills, and be pushed past their physical limits. This will both strengthen their bodies as well as their mindset as they are pressed with such demands. They will struggle and sometimes fail, and that is where they will learn valuable lessons in determination, motivation, perseverance, and commitment.
5. Your kids will develop important character traits that apply to other areas of their lives.
Any sport requires discipline, responsibility, accountability, and hard work. These are character traits we all want our kids to learn because they will apply to other areas of their lives. Athletics are a great way for students to learn time management and commitment. All athletic programs have mandatory expectations and regulations which will help your kid learn how to honor the rules and be held accountable if they don’t. Additionally, for students to participate in any sport, they must adhere to the academic requirements and general behavior guidelines as well. Not only will they learn to be disciplined and dedicated to the progress of their own athletic abilities, but they must also be responsible for their grades and behavior too.
6. Your kids can try new sports at a nominal fee.
The best part is that middle school sports are affordable, so it’s the perfect way to give your kid a new experience for a much smaller fee than most community or club sports programs.
If your child is interested in trying a new sport, this is the time to take advantage of excellent coaching opportunities that fit your budget. My son tried two new sports he had never played before, and from those experiences, he fell in love with one of them. He’s now a sophomore in high school and is still actively participating–and he can take that passion with him the rest of his life. He’s even considering continuing the sport in college, all because he was introduced to it in middle school.
Remember the end goal
While sports may not be for your student, middle school is a great time for kids to put themselves out there without too much of a commitment. The goal is to help your student grow as an individual and connect to their school community. Whether it’s sports or another activity, keep encouraging your child to try new things and meet new people.
The sports my son found in middle school helped him become more disciplined and responsible. He learned the value of hard work and tough competition. And he continues to be friends with many kids he met through those valuable experiences.
And you can’t put a price tag on that.
*We love this book, Middle School Matters, by Phyllis Fagell. Fagell helps parents use the middle school years as a low-stakes training ground to teach kids the key skills they’ll need to thrive now and in the future, including making good friend choices, negotiating conflict, regulating their own emotions, be their own advocates, and more. To answer parents’ most common questions and struggles with middle school-aged children, Fagell combines her professional and personal expertise with stories and advice from prominent psychologists, doctors, parents, educators, school professionals, and middle schoolers themselves.
Are you in the thick of raising your tweens and teens? You may like this book by Whitney Fleming, the co-owner of Parenting Teens & Tweens: Loving Hard When They’re Hard to Love: Essays about Raising Teens in Today’s Complex, Chaotic World.
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Laura Lowe says
Great article. I have seen this play out with my teenage son. The other amazing thing about middle school sports is assistance with hormone regulation. Their testosterone levels are increasing rapidly during puberty and sports helps manage some of the side effects from rapidly rising levels.