Check on that senior.

The one graduating in a few days or just graduated earlier this month.

The one who just went through a series of “lasts,” like the last Prom, last sports event, last performance.

The one who is so excited about the life before them but a little scared too.

Check on that senior who seems a little crabby because they are being pulled in a lot of different directions right now.

The one who isn’t sure what they want to do with their life.

The one trying to save money for college, a car, or their first apartment.

The one who just wants to sleep.

Check on that senior who seems to have gone into a spiral, who snaps at every interaction, who gets teary out of nowhere.

Check in on that big kid who seems to be soiling the nest before they fly, pushing curfews, leaving a mess everywhere, oblivious to everyone else around them.

High School Graduation is Exciting, a Relief, and a Little Scary

There is so much fun during this time: freedom from the routine of a school day, graduation parties, planning for a life ahead.

But there are also big emotions brewing at the top. Change can be hard.

Even the ones who appear to have it all together are feeling it right now. They can’t let up on the gas pedal; they can’t coast just yet.

And they are tired and a little burnt out and a little stressed.

They just finished high school, but they don’t know how to be an adult just yet.

So check on that senior in your life.

Maybe help them out a little bit, too, without asking what they need. Because they may not know what they need right now. They may not even think you can help.

So, maybe help them fill out that form. Or switch their laundry out.

Or, cut up an apple as a snack, like you used to do so many years ago.

Give them some grace, then give yourself some grace too.

This is a hard transition, one filled with joy and sadness and excitement and trepidation–for them and for you.

Let them know you believe in them. Let them know it’s going to be okay. Let them know you care in whatever small ways you can.

Because these last few months before preparing to fly? Well, it’s a lot.

So, check on that senior in your life. Even if, especially if, they say they don’t need you.

I promise you, they do.

Ten Ways to Support a Recent High School Graduate

1. Be an Encourager: Now is not the time to tell them how hard and awful the world is. Instead, talk about the opportunities that lie before them, share stories of success, affirm that it is okay that they don’t have their whole life figured out.
2. Provide career guidance: Discuss their interests, strengths, and goals to help them explore potential career paths. Offer information about different industries, job opportunities, and educational options. Facilitate meetings with people you know in fields of interest or let them shadow you in your job. Nothing beats hands-on knowledge.
3. Offer financial guidance: Many high schools do not deal with consumer finance, and some adults are still learning themselves. Talk to graduates about financial planning, including credit card interest rates, budgeting, retirement savings, and even what comes out of your paycheck and why.
4. Provide emotional support: Transitioning from high school to the next phase of life can be overwhelming. Be there to listen and offer emotional support. Encourage them to express their fears, concerns, and aspirations. Help them build resilience and self-confidence during this period of change.
5. Foster independence and life skills: Teach them essential life skills that will help them thrive in the adult world. This includes managing finances, cooking, laundry, basic household chores, and time management. Encourage them to take responsibility for their actions and become self-reliant. We love this book: Life Skills for Teens
6. Help them find a hobby: Networking for business is important, but networking for life is essential. Take them to a rock climbing class, learn to play golf, get your black belt, join a bike riding club, create pottery, or find a book club. Encourage those graduates to find something besides work or studying, because someday you may have a family and real responsibilities, and your “passion” may be the only thing that keeps your sanity.
7. Be a mentor (or help them find one): Mentors can provide valuable guidance, advice, and support as they navigate their educational and professional journey.
8. Talk about coping strategies: We don’t have to focus on the negative, but it’s no secret that life is hard. It’s important that we teach graduates how to practice self-care when the world seems too much. Here are some great strategies when your teen is feeling anxious: Three Practical and Effective Ways to Help Your Anxious Teen
9. Develop their attitude of gratitude: According to neuroscience experts, gratitude has the highest correlation with overall well-being than any other character trait. Gratitude is good for mental, physical, and social health, and in today’s complex, chaotic world, it can make all the difference in how someone gets through life. Help out a recent graduate out by reminding them about the importance of the little things, so they can take the bigger things in stride.
10. Encourage them to travel: Go. Anywhere. Vacation abroad, take a drive, go to a museum. Volunteer for the overseas assignment if it makes sense. Take the day trip to a different city. Explore every nook and cranny of where you live. Experience life, and don’t be scared of new places, new people, new ways to live. It will change who they are for the better.

High school and college are not the peaks

These years shape you, but they don’t define you.

You may not know what the future holds, but you don’t want high school to be the best years of your life.

So, recent graduates: It’s nice to keep your old friends close, but don’t be afraid to branch out and widen your circle either. Different experiences will always help you to grow both professionally and personally.

And remember, you don’t have to have it all figured out. 

Life is fluid. Just because you haven’t found your passion yet doesn’t mean you are a failure.

Keep searching for your joy, and look at every opportunity as a learning experience.

Are you in the thick of raising your tweens and teens? You may like this book by Whitney Fleming, the co-owner of Parenting Teens & Tweens: Loving Hard When They’re Hard to Love: Essays about Raising Teens in Today’s Complex, Chaotic World.

Parenting teens and tweens is hard, but you don’t have to do it alone.

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