Inside this post: Rugby Player Ilona Maher Is the Role Model Moms of Teen Girls Have Been Waiting For
“OMG, Mom, how are you not writing about Ilona Maher?” my teen daughter said to me recently.
“Wait, I can’t remember who she is…” As a middle-aged mom of three teenager daughters, there’s only so much information I can store in my brain right now.
“She is ah-may-zing. She’s huge on TikTok and is an awesome rugby player and she’s so funny and promotes body positivity. She is the best!” my daughter gushed.
Out of the mouths of babes.
{Daughter whipping out phone at lightning speed} “Just watch this.”
So I spent 27 seconds listening to Ilona talk about how all body types can be Olympians and encouraged people to see themselves in these athletes–from the smallest gymnast to the tallest volleyball player and a wide-shouldered rugby player to a thin sprinter. We are all worthy. We are all beautiful.”
And that’s all it took for me to watch the U.S. women’s sevens team match early one morning with my teenage daughters. America won its first sevens rugby medal in history (in a nail-biter) by beating Australia to bring home the Bronze.
Maher and the team were extraordinary, showing power, grace, teamwork, and perseverance–and looking good while doing it. I may even practice some stiff arms in the grocery store soon.
Related: Parenting in the Influencer Age of Toxic Social Media
Who is Ilona Maher
To put it simply, Maher is an Olympic rugby player, TikTok sensation, and advocate for body positivity.
She gained notoriety during the Tokyo Olympics three years ago by providing glimpses into the Olympic village.
According to the Team USA website, Maher originally hails from Burlington, Vermont. She began playing rugby at 17 and went on to play at the collegiate level at Quinnipiac University for three years. Maher plays center for the US women’s rugby team. Her father, also a rugby player, encouraged her to pick up the sport.
Why do teenagers love her?
Maher broke two million followers both on Instagram and TikTok during the Paris 2024 Games, and it’s easy to see why teenagers, and especially young girls, love her. She is funny, fashionable, and always on point with the trends. Her first TikTok at this year’s Olympics compared the Athlete’s Village to the popular television show Love Island, garnering the video more than 7 million views.
Teens also love her because she is both a fangirl and bestie with some of the biggest names in the business. Her recent videos with Coco Gauff, Jason Kelce and Snoop Dogg have been fan favorites, and Tom Brady and Lebron James asked her for selfies.
But why does this mom of teen girls love her?
I was a little skeptical at first. I feel like influencers are a dime a dozen these days and everyone spouts off the the same lines. But something was different about Maher. She is raw and authentic. She is strong and feminine. She is fun and fierce.
She’s everything we want our young girls to be.
In addition to her work ethic as an athlete, Maher has solidified herself as a champion for body positivity. Earlier this month, Maher took to her platform to respond to a troll who criticized her weight and body mass index (BMI).
When a commenter tried to make her feel bad by stating, “She probably has a BMI of 30,” Maher clapped back in the best possible way.
She said, “Yeah, I do.”
Maher admitted that she’s been “considered overweight” her whole life due to BMI standards, and that she’s felt bad about her weight and the way her body looks at many points in her life starting at a young age. But she states clearly and emphatically that she will no longer let the scale define her or her view of herself.
“BMI doesn’t really tell you what I can do. It doesn’t tell you what I do on the field, how fit I am,” she explained in her response. “It’s just a couple numbers put together. It doesn’t tell you how much muscle I have or anything like that. So yeah, I do have a BMI of 30. But alas, I’m going to the Olympics and you’re not.”
Boom. The roast heard around the world.
In a world that’s reducing our young people to numbers, whether it’s their GPA, how many advanced courses they take, how many awards they’ve won, or a number on a scale, Maher’s statement is music to this Mom’s ears.
And she seems to be just getting started. Ilona Maher is teaming up with brands to show young women they can be both strong and feminine while breaking barriers in the male-dominated sport of rugby.
While I’m not sure how much rugby I’ll be watching moving forward, to Ilona Maher, you’ve got a new fan in this mom.
Sports can be such a powerful way to get a message across.
We are all strong. We are all worthy. We are all beautiful regardless of our body type.
I won’t let anyone else define me. I won’t let a number define me.
And now an Olympic bronze medalist to boot.
Thanks, Ilona, for helping me show this sort of positivity to my daughter. Thanks for helping me to remember this about myself.
Thanks for being beautiful–inside and out.
Struggling with your teen? You may like the book You’re Not a Failure: My Teen Doesn’t Like Me Either by Whitney Fleming.
Parenting teens is hard but you don’t have to do it alone. These posts can help:
How To Help Tweens and Teens Avoid The Comparison Trap
Words Can Crush Our Teen Girls For A Lifetime, Here’s How To Help
This Is Why Teen Girls Are So Mean to Their Mothers
10 Common Problems Middle School Girls Face (And How Parents Can Help)
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