Many of us worry when we send our kids off to college. Did we prepare them enough? Will they make good choices? Will they be safe? Then we get a message from our college kid: “Do you need to put those pods in the washing machine?” or “How do you know when water is boiling?” and we shake our heads and perhaps worry more.
We worry of course about external threats, but also those brought on by their own poor decision-making. We send them off, knowing that their immature brains don’t always know when to say no to temptations such as drugs and alcohol, which while inherently dangerous in and of themselves, also tend to reduce inhibitions and increase the likelihood of sexual assault. We can’t be there to physically protect them—all we can do is talk to our kids, early and often about these dangers, and equip them with figurative or sometimes literal tools.
You might also like to read: Cue the Tears: How to Survive Freshman College Drop Off
5 Safety Tips for College Kids
1. Be prepared for self-defense.
While any sort of weapons and most pepper sprays are generally not permitted on college campuses, a small personal alarm (such as the Birdie) that is easy to carry and can quickly be activated can be an effective deterrent from a personal attack. (Take your child outdoors and have them test it so they know how it works.) Another option is gifting a self-defense class. At a minimum, point out that being aware of your surroundings and alert to potential dangers makes one less likely to be a target. Making noise and fighting back will make it clear to any bystanders that any physical contact is non-consensual. Providing your college student with adequate self-defense resources is paramount to their safety.
2. Use the buddy system, especially after dark.
Talk about personal safety, with your kids and their friends. Not only should they know the common sense stuff like to always check the lock on their apartment or dorm room door, but also, remind them that there is safety in numbers. One important rule is to leave no one behind when going out as a group. Many students have a false sense of security on campus and while all schools now have safety call boxes with emergency phones to reach campus security, they may not realize that it took a tragedy on a college campus to bring these about. Talk about basic public safety rules—walk with a buddy at night, stay in well-lit areas, call for a ride or escort.
3. Make sure you know what you’re taking.
You’ve likely heard of so-called “date-rape” drugs and may have talked to your kids about how to protect themselves from drink spiking. But you should also remind them to be aware of everything that goes into their body. Prescription drugs should never be shared. (The use of ADHD drugs as “study enhancers” has become common on college campuses.) They should know that any medication has potential side effects and can interact with other medications, or even food. Even caffeine is a drug (overuse can lead to insomnia, migraines, fever, difficulty breathing, hallucinations or convulsions).
Encourage them to read labels, even for medications they have taken before. Some medications come in a variety of formulations and the dosage may differ. Remind them that multi-symptom cold medicines often contain multiple ingredients and that taking a pain reliever on top of the cold medicine can result in an overdose. Though we know they shouldn’t be drinking, we also know they may be anyway. It likely hasn’t occurred to them that over-the-counter drugs can interact with alcohol. They may need to be told, for example, that that any medication containing acetaminophen combined with alcohol is particularly toxic to the liver.
4. Drink responsibly.
While most college kids can’t drink legally until their third or fourth year, we all know that alcohol use is common on college campuses. Telling your college student not to drink will likely not stop them from experimenting. Talk about some of the dangers of drinking too much. Give them concrete examples of what alcohol poisoning looks like and emphasize that they shouldn’t wait it out, but seek medical attention right away. College students have died when classmates ignored the signs either out of ignorance or most likely fear of getting in trouble.
Also point out the danger of combining caffeine and alcohol. While the combo has become a popular choice, even in bars, it is not a safe one. The CDC warns that the caffeine in these drinks can make you feel more alert which can lead you to drink more alcohol. This combo can also cause a raise in blood pressure (increasing the risk of a stroke or heart attack), or an irregular heartbeat.
You might also like to read: 10 Important Things Parents Should Never Do for Their College Freshman
5. Watch out for new dangerous trends.
Young people are good at coming up with new and stupid ways to harm themselves. One you may not have heard of: the honey packet sex trend. Apparently, some young men are taking “enhancement” drugs dissolved in small packets of honey. While this can be an awkward conversation, they need to know that “performance anxiety” is not the same as erectile dysfunction and that ED drugs taken by anyone who does not medically need them can be dangerous.
It’s normal for parents to worry, especially if your new adult lives at a faraway college. We can no longer fix boo boos with a bandage and a kiss, or protect them from dangerous situations or people, or even themselves. What we can do, though is help prepare them for potential scenarios they may encounter, offer them tools to help them be more independent, and be available to answer texts and phone calls, even when all they want is for us to listen as they talk their way through to the answer.
Looking for an additional resource to help ensure your teen has the life skills they need?
We recommend Life Skills for Teens: How to Cook, Clean, Manage Money, Fix Your Car, Perform First Aid, and Just About Everything in Between by Karen Harris.
Parenting teens is a tough job, but you’re not alone. These posts might help:
Over 100 of the Absolutely Best Gift Ideas for College Students
The Momancholy Is Real After You Drop Your Child Off at College
Dear Son At College, That’s Not My Job Anymore
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